I Can See Him Dying
by Redzy
Summary: Joey and Pacey are ‘together’ after the finally. But this is what I think it would be like if Dawson moved to New York. This Story is based on the song Unfaithful By: Rihanna


I Can See Him Dying 

This Story is based on the song_ **"Unfaithful"** By: **Rihanna**_

Summary: Joey and Pacey are 'together' after the finally. But this is what I think it would be like if Dawson moved to New York.

_  
Story of my life  
Searching for the right  
But it keeps avoiding me  
Sorrow in my soul  
Cause it seems that wrong  
Really loves my company  
_

It's hard to explain the situation…

When one of my best friends died, Jen, I wasn't the same person. I had lost so many people my Mom, my Dad, Mr. Leery-my surrogate father, and Jen. When she died, another part of me died too, as other parts had died with those people. Pacey and I got back together. I truly needed comfort and at the time I believed he could give it to me.

He's more than a man  
And this is more than love  
The reason that the sky is blue

About a month and a half after we had gotten back together, one thing happened- Dawson. Dawson had moved back to New York to work on a new project with Steven Spielburg. When I had gotten the call, my heart fluttered, and I could only think about him.

For the next few weeks after that, I helped him move in to a comfortable apartment a few blocks from my own. We got to know each other again. Dawson and I talked about everything imaginable, from work to love. We had no idea what we were doing. We were falling in love all over again. One night, while Pacey was in Capeside, Dawson had said he wanted to take me out to dinner. He called it our "One Month anniversary" since we had truly become best friends again. I smiled when he told me this. I laughed and said I would be honored. I was just so happy.

So I got dressed in my sexy red dress, put my make-up on, curled my hair, and just as he buzzed up, I was putting on my brand new high heels. We went out to dinner.

But clouds are rolling in  
Because I'm gone again  
And to him I just can't be true

We talked during dinner and had such a great time. When we were done dinner, I knew we had had just a tad too much wine. We walked back to his apartment, because his was the closest, and we went in to his apartment. To this day I know wine and Joey Potter don't mix. I am both grateful for it and despise it all at once. We had got to talking and I kissed him. And we all know what escalated from that action. After that I knew I had fallen for Dawson Leery , yet again.

And I know that he knows I'm unfaithful  
And it kills him inside

As the months pasted after that, Dawson and I continued to see each other. I stopped asking Pacey to visit me in NewYork more and more as I fell more and more in love with Dawson. I think that Pacey always knew but one day when I forgot our anniversary, it confirmed his suspicions.

To know that I am happy with some other guy  
I can see him dying

Pacey never said anything. He continued to visit dispite my repeditive response "No NO No, it's ok, I have to work most of the weekend." I could see it in his eyes. The hazel orbs grew grayer and grayer every time I told him I had to work, or I was going out to drink with some girl friends from work.

I don't wanna do this anymore  
I don't wanna be the reason why  
Everytime I walk out the door  
I see him die a little more inside  
I don't wanna hurt him anymore

My excuses became too hard to make up. I spent more time making up excuses than I actually talked to Pacey anymore. He knew.

I don't wanna take away his life  
I don't wanna be...  
A murderer

I knew, I knew he was secretly counting down the days till I would tell him it is over.

I feel it in the air  
As I'm doing my hair  
Preparing for another date  
A kiss up on my cheek  
He's here reluctantly

Dawson kept telling he to tell him. Every morning I woke up in his strong arms, I knew I had found me soul mate again. Behind my boyfriend's back. Dawson told me that this couldn't go on.

As if I'm gonna be out late  
I say I won't be long  
Just hanging with the girls

" Jo, I love you, more that the world. But I can't let this go on without you letting Pacey know this is over. Joey I want to spent my life with you. But we can't start without Pacey knowing it is over between you. You said he knew, well you got to tell him. You are hurting him ever day you don't come home at night or lie to him. You are killing him more and more with every or any lie. Please I love you, tell him."

A lie I didn't have to tell  
Because we both know  
Where I'm about to go  
And we know it very well

I knew Dawson was right. I hated it when he was. But I loved him. I loved Dawson so much. And I was killing Pacey with the love that my life thrived on.

Cause I know that he knows I'm unfaithful  
And it kills him inside  
To know that I am happy with some other guy  
I can see him dying

I have got to end this tonight. This hour. He said he would be back from the store in an hour. Sixty Minutes to go. Only three-thousand, six hundred seconds till I am free to love Dawson in the open, till I can marry him, bore his children, and grow old with him.

I don't wanna do this anymore  
I don't wanna be the reason why  
Everytime I walk out the door  
I see him die a little more inside

Only three-thousand, six hundred seconds till I kill another friend.

I don't wanna hurt him anymore  
I don't wanna take away his life  
I don't wanna be...  
A murderer

Our Love, his trust  
I might as well take a gun and put it to his head  
Get it over with

I try to go over exactly what I am going to say. 'Hey Pacey, I have been making love to your childhood best friend for the past nine months of our time together, for well, almost all of our time together. Sorry. I am going to Marry him with a clean conscience now thanks.' Nope that won't work. God this is hard.

I don't wanna do this  
Anymore  
Uh  
Anymore (anymore)

I hear the door of the apartment slam closed. This is it. I have to tell him now. If I don't I am only prolonging the inevitable, and the pain and hurt. I pray to god that he won't take it too hard.

I don't wanna do this anymore  
I don't wanna be the reason why  
Everytime I walk out the door  
I see him die a little more inside

"Pacey," I whisper, unable to hide my tears for all the pain I have caused. He looks at me with depressed eyes as he eyes my suitcases by my feet. He nods. He knows what I am going to tell him. I open my mouth to explain but he puts up his hand to stop me. His eyes silently thank me for telling me. I try to get out another apology but my lungs won't let enough air out to I can pronounce any understandable phrases.

And I don't wanna hurt him anymore  
I don't wanna take away his life

He nods at me. I run to him and kiss him on the mouth softly and whisper "I am so sorry." He smiles weakly and tells me to go to him. " Invite me to the wedding." Those were the last words to me. "You bet." I exit the apartment. I run down the stairs and out the door to a waiting Dawson. I kiss him.

I don't wanna be...  
A murderer (a murderer)

I finally chose. The triangle was over, for good, that day. I chose my soul mate.

No no no no

I just wish I didn't have to hurt my friend so much.

Yeah yeah yeah


End file.
